I should spread out these posts so I’m not posting three times in one day and then not again for two months. Hmm.

1. My summer knitting project is going to be a lace scarf knit in DK weight silk merino. I’m hoping it’s
luxurious enough to keep my attention. I’m so bad at finishing any lace projects, but it’s way too hot to knit anything else in the Texas heat.

2. Hugh and Joe are moving out at the end of May and Katie is moving in…. should be fun! Trying to decide about additional housemates as well – my mortgage just went up almost $200/month so I could definitely use more help…

3. I’m going to try to start a Ph.D. program in the fall of 2012…. maybe? I guess what I mean is that I’m going to start looking at programs and re-take the GRE (my old scores are expired) in preparation for starting then at the earliest. Initial research has me pretty interested in a program at Boston College, but there are some other good ones out there that I’m looking at as well.

4. My computer battery is broken. It won’t charge at all…and it’s out of warranty. So I can use the computer with the cord plugged in, but as soon as it unplugs it shuts down. Yuck.

5. I miss a lot of people today. Not sure why it feels like such a “down” day, but I have that loneliness feeling that can’t be addressed by being with others. It’s just there. Regardless of the surroundings. Hate it.

6. My kitchen is a mess. I want to clean it up. Kindof.

A couple months ago, our household started looking into fostering dogs through the Waco Humane Society so Denali would have some company but without having to commit forever to the care of another dog. (i.e. if I ever move, I already have plenty of pets to have to deal with). However, once we got on the list to actually do the fostering, I learned that there really are two kinds of fosters; adult dogs that have some sort of special need (like needing to be housetrained, or having separation anxiety, or having some sort of medical issue), or puppies that are not old enough to have all of their vaccinations and therefore are not really suited for the shelter environment (basically, they are almost guaranteed to get sick with something fatal if they spend their whole puppyhood at the shelter because diseases like distemper and parvo are so common in our area and people bring their dogs to the humane society thinking they are an animal hospital or something which gets all the rest of the dogs sick).

Needless to say, with the lifestyle I have, I went the puppy route and while it’s been quite a bit of work, and a lot of time spent cleaning up, I have also really enjoyed it. There is something quite pleasing about hanging out with puppies. Also, I’m sure there is some misguided maternal affection that drives my interest in doing this at all – but for sure fostering dogs is a simpler process than fostering humans… we’ll see if I’m up for that (I do think I might be interested) in another chapter of my life.

First we cared for two little terrier mixes that were theoretically from the same litter, but you would have a hard time guessing that from how they looked. Someone suggested they might have different fathers….. We named them St. Ignatius (Iggy) and St. Clare. Cuties.

After those two got adopted by two nice families, we got a puppy that originally we thought might be a St. Bernard mix, but she’s just not growing fast enough to be preparing to be such a big dog. Katie named her Lindy after the dance…. she’s been a very easy puppy, which makes me think she might be older than I thought orginally. I guess it’s hard to tell and no one has a good guess these days on her breed, so she’s a mystery. Still available for adoption!

And *then*, I guess because I’m a sucker, I took three young Aussie puppies home with me on Thursday. Since I just got back from a trip to San Francisco (I should blog about that, too), we named
them after neighborhoods/streets in the bay area.

And of course, there’s still my big puppy Denali, who gets more and more sweet and cuddly as she gets older. I’ve been waking up to find her on my bed snuggled up against me the last few nights. Usually it’s a bit earlier than I’d like to be up, but it’s not a bad way to wake up if it has to happen, I guess.

I think once these four puppies find their forever homes, I'll take a break for a bit. There's a changing of the housemates in late May/early June and I'm traveling some for the summer....one can only handle so much chaos at once. (or so they say).

I really did mean it when I said two months ago that I wanted to blog more…. just not sure now why I never did.

I thought a good place to start would be to post a reflection I gave at a Void event a few months ago. The context of the event was an exploration of the confession of belief, and when I spent some time thinking about my own beliefs, I realized that I already represent my beliefs in the many places I describe myself and my values online, and perhaps most specifically in online dating ads. I’m not ashamed of using online people meeting services – and so I’ve adapted my profile from match.com to read like a confession of belief.
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T.S. Eliot is quoted as saying… “There is no life that is not lived in community. And no community not lived in praise of God” – T.S. Eliot

Likewise, I believe humans were created to be in relationships with each other.

I believe humor is important in life.

I believe it is important to put people at ease and allow them to be fully themselves when they are with me.

I believe simple things like fresh baked bread, hitting all the green lights, a freshly cleaned kitchen, good hold music, chipotle burritos, and the laughter of children should be cherished.

I believe there is great enjoyment to be had from the outdoors, fresh fruit, strong coffee, live music, and the occasional camping or hiking trip.

I believe in the value of things that are made by hand.

I believe in buying my furniture used.

I believe in hospitality and invite people into my home at every chance.

I believe in turning the lights off when I leave the room.

I believe I learn more from NPR than from KLove.

I believe in knitting my own sweaters.

I believe beer makes any conversation better. Add a firepit on a beautiful warm evening and I believe it might rival heaven.

I believe that music should speak to my spirit rather than only my ears.

I believe in surrounding myself with love, laughter, people, community and opportunities to give of my faith and blessings from God to others.

I believe the people in my life have helped me see myself more clearly, even when I’m not always fond of what I see.

I believe there is profound beauty in brokeness as well as in success.

I believe the joy as well as the heartache I’ve experienced in my life have made me who I am, and I believe I’m called to share myself with others regardless of what their experiences have been.

I have faith in a God that is bigger and more amazing than I’ll probably ever understand. And maybe I’m not supposed to ever understand anyway.

I believe in being a good friend…. supporting when support is needed and challenging when challenge is needed.

I believe that contentment can be found just being in the same room as someone I care about.

I believe that sometimes the best evenings have more silence than words spoken, even though communication is also really important to me.

I believe in valuing self-awareness but try not to be self-focused.

I believe I’d like to have a family someday to give myself to intentionally, but I don’t think that will mean 3 cute kids, a minivan and soccer practice.

My belief in a sovereign grace-extending God is central to my ideas about the world and my insistence on loving all people regardless of their faults and/or strengths.

However, when I say I’m “Christian” I fear that others will not understand. I don’t always vote republican. I intentionally live in a multi-income neighborhood. I drink socially. I’m not a virgin. I have close friends who are gay and lesbian.

I don’t believe we were put on earth to separate ourselves from the “secular.” I believe God created all of the world, which makes all things sacred.

I believe that God is endlessly and tirelessly pursuing me, and that there is nothing I can do to keep His love from me.

I believe faith and doubt can live in the same person, and honestly, I spent more time with doubt. Nevertheless, God has shown me time and time again the beauty that is His love.

I believe almost all men look great with a beard.

I believe that someday I might meet someone that wants to partner with me in life. Or maybe not. But either way, I believe I must continue to learn how to love the unlovable, work on my shortcomings and live my life as fully as possible.

It felt pretty vulnerable to read this on stage (and also to post it here!), but I’m trying not to live in fear, but rather live in grace.

Our more recent Void event, “Revival” was also quite powerful and well received…. looking forward to seeing where the group goes next.