This week really is flying by. Hard to believe it’s already Thursday evening, and the weekend is within reach. Not that I’m living for the weekends… but it hardly feels like there is time enough in the week to do everything I need to get done.

Had a conversation today that was eye-opening in terms of how I’m experiencing my life here these days. I’ve been holding on so much to my knowledge that being here at Baylor and in Waco was where God wants me… I think I thought that just because this is the right place for me, I was required to be happy about it. So, I still am happy, and I really believe there are great things for me here that I haven’t even discovered yet, which is exciting!

But I’m also pretty frustrated, maybe even angry, because the one thing I had committed to myself about in this last transition was that I was NOT going to move to a new city where I didn’t know anyone, didn’t have any community, and would have to start over in establishing familiarity. And now… here I am… in a huge big state where I hardly know anyone, in a culture that feels so foreign to me, and still thousands of miles away from the most precious people in my life.

I guess I thought that I shouldn’t feel both peace and anger at the same time, but now I’m realizing perhaps that’s a flawed perspective. And maybe, it really makes the most sense, that I could be completely content with where my life is, but still disappointed that it isn’t what I thought I wanted. Like a grieving in the midst of joy.

Today I’m thankful for cup a’ noodle, no gas shortage in central Texas, and people who are willing to listen.

I’m not sure what it says about me that I can’t remember the last time I stayed up past midnight. I guess that’s what getting up every morning at 7am will do to me.

I finally finished my knitting Olympics project! (Well… except for weaving in ends, crocheting around the neck edge and blocking it). Sadly it really doesn’t fit me, so I’ll have to wait until it gets to it’s new owner before I post real pictures, which may be Christmas if I decide to give it as a gift. I do love how it came out though, and I’m really glad I made it. I love this yarn… and I’m thinking about making some sort of felted rug with it sometime soon. I need to start knitting more items for my house.

Did anyone else watch the Emmy’s? It reminded me that I need to finish watching Mad Men, which Patti and I started over the summer. It also made me wonder if I need to give 30 Rock another chance… I watched the first 3 or 4 episodes and really disliked it. Am I strange for not liking it, or is it the type of show that just isn’t for everyone? I do like Tina Fey usually…

Oh… Clementine is becoming less nasty to Bear these days. I think everything’s going to be okay.

All this talk of financial crisis and credit crisis makes me really nervous as I’m currently embarking on the largest financial purchase/life change I’ve made so far in the span of my short 32 years of life. I feel good about the house I’m buying, relatively good about the mortgage I got (went with the 30 year at a slightly lower interest rate than I first thought), and believe that my job is stable, but I can’t help wondering what is going to happen with the prices of food and other items I’ll need to survive. I already feel like I can’t seem to go grocery shopping without going over the budget I’ve set for myself. Things are just REALLY expensive (and I don’t think that stuff in general is much cheaper in Texas than in California).

I guess I just feel anxious… but maybe after I finally get paid at the end of this month and start to figure out how I will manage this new life, I’ll start feeling better. I’m feeling really independent, which it turns out is encouraging and depressing at the same time. I can manage all of this on my own… but that means I’m out here in the world on my own. Blah.

Clem and Bear aren’t exactly getting along yet, but I think that things are going to be okay. If nothing else, neither of them are hiding - they are still strolling around the house and okay with each other in the same room for the most part, Clementine just pulls out a hiss every once in awhile. I think sometimes she forgets she’s supposed to be pissed at the “new kid” because she’ll be there all quiet and he’ll be sleeping and then suddenly out of nowhere she stands up and hisses in his general direction. It’s quite humorous actually.

<a href=”http://www.rvthereyet.org”>My parents</a> are coming to Texas for the next month and will be in Waco next weekend and then for about 10 days at the end of October. I’m glad I’ll have some help for the move and for settling into the new house. Maybe they will even help me weed the front garden and taken me to IKEA in their pickup truck. I’m going to contact the current owners to see if we can stop by the house next Saturday so we can look at what projects might need to be done. Plus, I just want to see the house again… I feel like I miss it.

Must head off now to a string of meeting.

P.S. I’m so glad that Waco has an NPR radio station and a PBS TV station.